What NASA astronaut Cady Coleman can teach us about trust and vulnerably

NASA astronaut Cady Coleman—who spent six months aboard the International Space Station during her third mission as the only woman in a six-member crew—has just released a new book: Sharing Space: An Astronaut’s Guide to Mission, Wonder and Making Change.

Praised by Hillary Rodham Clinton as “an inspiring, unique road map for leaders everywhere,” the book explores Coleman's extraordinary journey, both in space and as a leader navigating high-stakes teamwork.

One of the most compelling parts of her story involves a conversation she and a fellow crewmate had years after their mission on Adam Grant’s WorkLife podcast. The discussion centered around themes of trust, cooperation, and the dynamics of working as a team under pressure.

Coleman recalls a moment that stopped her in her tracks—what she calls one of those “aha” moments when someone articulates something you’ve always felt but never quite put into words. During the conversation, Adam Grant asked: “What comes first—trust or vulnerability?”

It’s a question that challenges conventional thinking. Most people assume that trust must come first in order to feel safe being vulnerable. But Grant flipped that assumption. Vulnerability, he argued, is what actually builds trust—not the other way around.

Coleman reflects on how counterintuitive and difficult that is, especially in environments where trust feels shaky. Your natural instinct is to protect yourself, not open up. But in both space missions and everyday leadership, real trust is often born from moments of genuine vulnerability.